February 2nd, 2016 By Alcatraz

32 men rolled into Highlands to on a foggy, but 54 degree February morning. While many in the PAX donned shorts and t-shirts, some were still dressed for winter. And yes, @Conchito still had a skull cap on. His hair only makes an appearance when the temps are in the 60s. Those who arrived on time got their war paint on. YHC shamed @Pavarotti into the tribe by recalling that @Gump was the only one who didn’t wear war paint during the last Touchdown Beatdown. Disclaimer was given and the PAX was off.

WARMARAMA:

• 15 x SSH IC
• 15 x IST IC
• 10 x Merkin IC
• 15 x Cotton Picker IC

A mock football field was laid out before the PAX and the instructions for the Touchdown Beatdown were given. They were…

Bear Crawl endzone
10 Carolina Dry Docks
20 Squats
30 Merkins
40 Lunges (single leg)
50 LBC
40 Lunges (single leg)
30 Merkins
20 Squats
10 Carolina Dry Docks
Bear Crawl endzone
Run back to the other endzone repeato

The 30 minute playlist was cued and when Curtis James Jackson III, aka 50 Cent, said “go” the PAX began to traverse the field as many times as possible. The London Philharmonic’s Hallelujah Chorus mercifully heralded when the fullness of time was completed (that sentence sounded really churchy). Distances were recorded and the PAX moseyed to…

MARY:

• 15 x Pretzel Crunch IC
• 15 x Squirm IC
• 25 x Low Flutter IC

COT and BOM!

YHC recorded the finishing distances as they were written with no attempt to make the results uniform. Those with two distances participated in Episode II, there is no record of Episode I.

Alcatraz 4 + end zone (near), 3 + 20 far
Avalanche 6.2
Barnabas 4.5
BOS 3.5
Buckwheat 3.7
Chavez 4 + 40
Chief 4 + 10
Chopper 5, 6 + 20
Conchito 3 + 30
Derby 4? – left early
Disaster 3.5, 4.4
Dodger 4.6
Fez 4 + 30
Flair 3.7
Forgotten Jelly 4 + 30 far
Glock 4, 5
Google 5, 5
Grinder 5 + CDD (near)
Gump 3.5
Hammer 4.75, 5
Harding 6.3
Hugo 5
Ironhide 4.5
Million $ Man 4.6
Mugshot 4 + 4yds
Nanny 3 + LBCs, 4 + 20 far
Parkour 3.6
Pavarotti 6.0
Pharaoh 7
Pony Boy 4.25, 4.3
Sandman 3.6
Shazam 4 + 40 near
Slappy 4.1
Snare 4 + end zone (near), 4.3
Sully 4 + 20
Thorn 5 + LBCs (trophy), 7 + 20 near (trophy)
Vector 3 + LBCs
Wild Turkey 5.5

The below numbers are YHC’s attempt at math. Not offended if someone corrects my calculations:

• 30 minutes, 1800 seconds
• 240 yards each cycle
• 250 reps each cycle
• 7 cycles (1750 reps) and then to run to far 30 = 1760 yards = 1 mile
• Pace of half a second per rep, 15 minute mile average pace for running and bear crawl to go the mile
• Pace of three-quarter second per rep, 8 minute mile average pace for running and bear crawl to complete the mile
• Pace of one second per rep, you will have 1 minute mile average pace for running and bear crawl to complete the mile (3 miles faster than Bolt in the 100)

The Touchdown Moleskin:

1. Great work by the PAX this morning! There were lots of sweat blobs at the 50 yard line. Your times will be saved on a combined list and updated each time to chart progress. Proud to see that some of you made great gains. YHC went backwards, but after starting the playlist and running to the first endzone only then realized the gloves were back at the table. #loser
2. The Shield is at the home of @Chopper tonight and he and @BOS have the Q! Starts at 8p, you can roll up a little before then if you like. (4531 Ridge Rd, across the street from the main entrance of Highland Creek)
3. AND STILL! Congrats to @Thorn who retained his title of Touchdown Beatdown Champion. Tclaps to @Pharaoh who was reeling him in.
4. Nice to see men who usually post at other AOs and to see those who haven’t posted in a while.
5. Some of the PAX were sporting some epic war paint patterns!
6. Please sound off in the comments below if your distance needs adjustment or clarification. YHC has doubts about some like @PonyBoy and @Snare who may have shorted themselves 1 cycle. And while YHC has mad respect for the front runners, one has to ask did the 7 cycle guys really lap @Glock and @Google twice? YHC was too busy trying to breathe and get through the Merkins to keep up with anyone else’s pace. #notjudging #justwondering
7. YHC rarely says anything serious in the gloom, but I’m very thankful for F3. It is an incredible blessing to have a place where I’m just a guy and not the reverend. And it gets me out of the house I share with 4 women. #estrogenoverload Much love to my F3 brothers and if you need me to switch into reverend mode, always honored to do that as well.

Highlands, Skywalker, Tradition

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