May 5th, 2017 By Chum

when black & white fades to grey. . .

5 men entered the pre-dawn of the MHM site this Friday morning. Many more contemplated the weight of their sheets and decided to succumb to the fartsack. The Q pre-blasted a bit about wet rucking ahead of a 0530 0.0 beatdown, none showed for the ruck but 5 posted for the pre-rain pain and a bunch of chatter about the consequences of living life without mentorship and accountability. Hence the title of this BB.

HIM is a term we banter about in the gloom; it is an acronym for High Impact Male. Another term F3 tosses out a lot is ISI, which is an acronym for Iron Sharpens Iron. Amongst other things, these 2 hashtags intersect in the neighborhoods of accountability and mentorship. By this time the reader may be curious why YHC is going on about this instead of the light BB material that he was expecting. Read on, we’ll get to that.

YHC and his M are witnessing our friend’s family fall apart, at the fault of the male. Ok, YHC M is friends with the wife, our kids are friends, but YHC and he aren’t as close as all that. Better details were given in the gloom and will not be shared here in this public forum. Ultimately he cheated and is willing to give up 15 years of marriage, 6+ kids (M is 9months), and a career in ministry for a woman he’s known less than a year. One pax in the gloom said it well, pastors have needs too. That is true. There are positions and men around us in society that many of us look up to and assume they are safe, not prone to … Yet this story has one sad fact, no one held him accountable in his position, he had no mentor, no one impacting his life. While he oversaw and even mentored others, no one held him in check.

There are too many stories, publicly available in news cycles and recent history that chronicle the fall from grace of pastor after pastor, father after father, husband after husband. The details may be different, but the narrative is still the same. Bit by bit, he let his guard down, makes friendships he shouldn’t be making with any other than his wife, then things get a little too comfortable, lines are crossed and viola. Friends, coworkers, and even spouses are blindsided by this sudden change made clear in public lights. But there is nothing sudden about any of it. Like the song says,

It’s a slow fade when you give yourself away
It’s a slow fade when black and white are turned to gray
And thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
It’s a slow fade, it’s a slow fade

People never crumble in a day. Thoughts invade. Choices are made. And ultimately a price will be paid. The story of our friend, and all the other stories sound the same around this point; casual relationships become intimate affairs not overnight but slowly, quietly, secretly. Often in isolation and loneliness because “she gets me” or something in that manner and no one else was close enough to step in to seek and speak the truth.

Legality and morality aside, the point is that many of these slip-ups and mistakes could have been avoided with regular visits to the places mentioned earlier, accountability and mentorship. And a great way to get there is via the avenues of HIM and ISI.

Don’t let the thin veils of isolation shroud our life. Push through, reach out and invite a brother, a mentor, a friend to hold us accountable; and not just in regards to how often we post around the shovelflag. Open our lives up to the hard questions, and be man enough to admit the truth; that is how Iron Sharpens Iron. But don’t just submit; submission is a one-way street. Be that guy for someone in your life. If you don’t know that person yet, volunteer to be a mentor at any number of places near your life. That is how we become High Impact Males. Impact is felt.

Message over, here is the account of what happened in the gloom Friday morning:

5 cycles of Ciabata with Kettlebells (40s work / 20s rest, 8 rounds each, with 10 secs rest between each cycle)

• Cycle 1 – 2-handed swings
• Cycle 2 – Tea Bag Squats
• Cycle 3 – 1-handed swings
• Cycle 4 – 1-arm press
• Cycle 5 – Deadlift

COT with NOR

NMM (given first, above)

AYE!

Mint Hill Metal

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