4 of Harrisburg’s most finely dressed men got up early (not early enough for El Dorado, though it appeared) to scarf some delicious breakfast and encourage one another to be servant-leaders in our marriages and families.

Here’s a copy-and-pasted version for those interested:

Verses to reference/discuss:

• Genesis 1,2,3
• 1 Peter 3:7
• Proverbs 31: 10-12, 27-29
• Ephesians 5:23
• Colossians 3:18

The 4 main needs of a wife from her husband:

1. _______________________ (COMPANIONSHIP)
2. _______________________ (SECURITY)
3. _______________________ (SIGNIFICANCE)
4. _______________________ (EMOTIONAL RESPONSIVENESS)

25 Ways to Be a Servant Leader, taken from “The Quest For Authentic Manhood” by Robert Lewis (consider which of these 4 needs is met by the actions below):

1. A servant-leader includes his wife in _______________________ the future. (ENVISIONING)
2. A servant-leader accepts _______________________ for his family. (SPIRITUAL RESPONSIBILITY)
3. A servant-leader is willing to say _____________________ and _____________________ to his family. (“I’M SORRY”/”FORGIVE ME”)
4. A servant-leader discusses _______________________ responsibilities with his wife and makes sure they are _______________________ distributed. (HOUSEHOLD/FAIRLY)
5. A servant-leader seeks the consultation of his wife on all major _______________________ decisions. (FINANCIAL)
6. A servant-leader _______________________ with commitments he has made to his wife. (FOLLOWS THROUGH)
7. A servant-leader anticipates the different _______________________ his marriage will pass through. (SEASONS)
8. A servant-leader anticipates the different _______________________ his children will pass through. (STAGES)
9. A servant-leader _______________________ tells his wife what he _______________________. (FREQUENTLY/LIKES ABOUT HER)
10. A servant-leader provides _______________________ for his family’s needs. (FINANCIALLY)
11. A servant-leader deals with/eliminates _______________________ so he can _______________________ with his wife and family. (DISTRACTIONS/TALK)
12. A servant-leader _______________________ with his wife and family on regular basis. (PRAYS)
13. A servant-leader _______________________ meaningful family _______________________. (INITIATES/TRADITIONS)
14. A servant-leader _______________________ for the family on a regular basis. (PLANS FUN OUTINGS)
15. A servant-leader takes the time to give his children _______________________ about life, which in turn gives them confidence with their peers. (PRACTICAL INSTRUCTIONS)
16. A servant-leader _______________________ the _______________________ of the home and anticipates any pressure points. (MANAGES/SCHEDULE)
17. A servant-leader keeps his family _______________________ sound and out of harmful ___________. (FINANCIALLY/DEBT)
18. A servant-leader makes sure he and his wife have drawn up a _______________________ and arranged a well-conceived plan for their _______________________ in case of __________________. (WILL/CHILDREN/DEATH)
19. A servant-leader lets his wife and children into the _______________________ of his life. (INTERIOR)
20. A servant-leader _______________________ his wife often in _______________________. (HONORS/PUBLIC)
21. A servant-leader explains _______________________ to each child in a way that gives them a wholesome perspective. (SEX)
22. A servant-leader _______________________ his wife to _______________________ as an individual. (ENCOURAGES/GROW)
23. A servant-leader takes the lead in _______________________ with his wife sound, biblically-supported family _______________________. (ESTABLISHING/VALUES)
24. A servant-leader _______________________ a small group of men who are dedicated to _______________________ their skills as a man, husband, and father. (JOINS/IMPROVING)
25. A servant-leader provides __________ for his wife to pursue her own personal __________________. (TIME/INTERESTS)

Great conversation this morning, men. I speak for myself in saying that we as men, in general, do a pretty bad job of “diving deeper” with each other to discuss things of significance. I hope these conversations can continue as we challenge each other in all areas, and keep one another accountable.

2 thoughts on “Servant-Leaders

  1. BBQ

    @Sundial – Really enjoyed our time yesterday morning. Some of these servant leader qualities I’ve heard before, others were new, and some I needed to hear again! I thought all of them were very good. I also shared them with the M last night. She said (in a polite way) “Hmm…that’s one you could work on.” Yeah, I’ll admit there are several I’m not doing that I need to be doing. I’ll just ask for a little grace and work on ’em.

    @Banjo Boy – really liked your suggestion on a weekly “date night.” Again, that’s an area I don’t do enough of. And a date is not always something fancy that costs a lot. Two bowls, two spoons, and ice cream (after the kids are in bed) is a date for us! And one the M really liked once before. And there’s no worries, I’ll work off the extra ice cream with the PAX in the gloom.

    @PAX – thanks again guys. I’ll be back!

  2. SunDial Post author

    Glad you could join us, and thanks for the contribution! This was my virgin “Q” at Endurance, so I look forward to hearing wisdom you guys can impart on all of us! Indeed, we can all stand to do better at being better servant-leaders!

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