March 3rd, 2020 By Alcatraz

The light rain faded away as a PAX of 16 rolled in for Club Alcatraz.  YHC had a playlist rolling and a plan for the men of the gloom.  Not surprising that the #mumblechatter was strong in the Highlands.  The quite proper disclaimer was barely done before @Disaster steered the conversation towards the inspection of crotches to locate the bluetooth speaker in YHC’s pullover.  @Greek should know better than to ask questions in a large group setting before anyone is even breathing heavy.  Innocent questions are easily tainted by the veteran #RESPECTS.  As the “soft subtle mix” of Will Smith transitioned into Van Halen a mosey began to the bus lot for…

WARMARAMA:

• YHC standard – if you don’t know what that is and would like to know just ask any Highlands regular or view a previous BB

THE THANG:

The PAX moved down the bus lot and discovered two jump ropes hanging on the fence.  After circling up, the jump ropes were distributed to a man on either side of the circle.  The holders of the ropes served as the timers and were asked to jump rope around the circle while the rest of the PAX worked though S.L.A.M.

• S – Squats
• L – Lunges
• A – Al Gore
• M – Monkey Humpers

As YHC attempted to explain that little girl running while spinning the rope was not proper form @Disaster proceeded to do exactly has he was told not to.  To which YHC concluded publicly that he had a woman part.  @Ambassador intrigued by the idea declared that if he had said woman part, he would never leave the house.  While funny, most of the PAX were probably afraid to ask just exactly what he’d be doing at home with said woman part.

After each man had a turn on the ropes, the PAX moseyed to the playground and partnered up for 10 Partner Assisted Horizontal Rows – PAHR.  Those not at the pull up bars took turns at Partner Stacked Planks – PSP (planking with their partner’s feet on their back).

This is not the first time the men of Highlands have seen this exercise and the question about should the legs be held open was strange and disturbing, but yet not completely surprising.  The PAX were reminded that this is not that kind of men’s group and the rotation to the pull up bars began.

YHC didn’t remember the uneven terrain portion of the disclaimer and wiped out on the first trip to the pull up bars.  You could almost hear Howard Cosell yell,  “Down goes Alcatraz, down goes Alcatraz!”  Check out Slack for the picture of YHC’s big toe and the toenail being peeled halfway back.

Everyone had a turn at the PAHR and a mosey began to the rail.

A wildly popular ladder of multiplicity ensued as the PAX started with the base number of 1 and progressed up to the Biblical number of completion 7.

• Derkins – base number x 1
• Incline Merkins – base number x 2
• Dips – base number x 3
• Air Presses – base number x 4

@Disaster basically called YHC a heretic since the 7th set was not a set of rest.  Hermeneutically incomplete maybe.  But heretical, never!.  The wildly popular series was brought to conclusion and the mosey began back to the playground.

Another round of PAHR and PSP.

Another round of circular jump roping and S.L.A.M.

Back to the playgroud for PAHR and PSP.

What goes up must go down at the rail and the base number of 7 started a reverse order of the wildly popular previous ladder.  During the set of base number 6, Elvis began to mercifully play on the bluetooth speaker which meant the PAX needed to mosey back to…

MARY:

• Pretzel Crunch x 15
• Low Flutter x 25
• The W x 15
• Low Dolly x 15

For the final exercise of MARY, the intentionally timed playlist concluded with The Whirling Dervishes cover of “You’re A Mean One Mr. Grinch”.  The PAX was to maintain the Plank until they heard “Mr. Grinch”.  At such time they were to perform one Merkin.  After two minutes and nine seconds that included 5 Merkins and a couple of guitar solos, Recover Recover was called.

COT and BOM!

The Grinchy Moleskin:

1. Great work today men!  For future workouts the circle should be a little bigger to get a little more jump rope action in.  Sure hope @Brinkley is there for the next time!
2. Remember @DearDiary as he is facing some serious health challenges.  It may not seem like much to wear blue, take a picture and send a tweet.  But as someone who has sat in a hospital with a family member, those seemingly small things can result in tremendous encouragement.
3. Thanks to @Ambassador for bringing some extra blue clothing items.  Wait – @Ambassador is bringing extra sets of clothes for the kids?  Maybe he already has said woman part?
4. Shout out to my partner @RickyFocker who carried a little extra today during the PSP.
5. Time Lapse!
6. The Passport Challenge is underway.  Get out there and visit some other AOs!
7. Sound off in the comments for any corrections or worthwhile additions.  There were probably lots of great #mumblechatter that would bring joy to the readers!

Always an honor to lead the PAX!

---