Kojak’s Dance Moves and Othello’s Hip Hop: Inside the Job 13:15 Workout

July 15th, 2023 By Constitution

Missed out on the divine madness that unfolded at the Job 13:15 Workout? Oh, you poor unfortunate souls! Picture this: a motley crew of fitness disciples, led by a charismatic and charming individual, embarked on a Herculean journey of sweat and suffering. The warm-up alone was a symphony of SSH, IST, Hillbillies, and Long/Low Lunges that would make your quads weep tears of regret. But that was just the beginning. The Thang, my friends, was an otherworldly affair. Thirteen exercises, each demanding a grueling 15 reps, were unleashed upon the participants. Lunges, squats, Bobby Hs, and more pushed muscles to the brink of rebellion. Yet, amidst the pain, Kojak emerged as the workout’s entertainment savant, displaying dance moves that defied the laws of physics and sanity. And let’s not forget Othello, whose introduction to “the hip hop” was a spectacle in itself. If you missed the Job 13:15 Workout, you missed an experience that words can hardly encapsulate. So, lace up those sneakers and brace yourself for the next session, for the opportunity to partake in this sweaty communion may never come again.

Job 13:15: “Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him”

PAX: Othello, Magic Mickey O’rourke, Constitution, Deadhead, Mullet, Talladega, Bear Claw, Kojak

Q: Constitution

Count: 8
FNG: 0

Warm up

SSH, IST, Hillbillies, Long/low/lunges

The Thang

13 Exercises, 15 reps

1.15 lunges
15 squats
15 Bobby Hs
15 side squats
15 dips
15 merkins
15 Australian snow angels
15 mountain climbers
15 burpees
15 sit ups
15 leg lifts
15 donkey kicks
15 high knees

Mary

People’s Mary

Kojak, MM, Mullet

Moleskin