February 25th, 2020 By Buckwheat

YHC was planning to take us on a field trip today to the dark, lower quadrant of our AO and incorporate some running into a Comanche beatdown for all those soon to be time lapsers.  However, due to a full day of rain and some drizzle this AM, I decided to keep us dry and stay in front of the school under our nice, LONG, covered area.  Seven Pax showed up to see what YHC had in store.

First, they wanted to see if YHC would be on time as I’ve turned into @Hammer2.0 by showing up late numerous times recently.  This is out of character for YHC, but I can do nothing but own it and work on it.  The Q’Drenaline was flowing and I was the FIRST Pax to arrive this morning, followed by a tight steering 10&2.  The rest arrived on time, EXCEPT Avalanche.  Here’s how things went down:

Mosey the length of the portico and back to the main entrance.  We thanked @Avalanche for gracing us with his presence without chastising him and started warm-o-rama:

SSH x15IC

IST x15IC

Low Slow Squat x15IC

It was here that @Avalanche had the nerve to mention YHC’s recent tardiness and @Ranger chimed in, adding to it and defending his partner in crime.   Did @Avalanche not realize that HE was late today and YHC was the first to arrive!?  Things escalated in a downhill spiral from here as @Avalanche proceeded to ask @Ranger to put his hands in his pockets.  Why you ask?  Was he trying to get him to play pocket pool or something?  WTF!?  Well, it’s because @Ranger showed up with his sweat pants on backwards with his pockets hanging out.  We all LMAO’d and still are doing so at this very moment…..  Back to warm-o-rama:

Mountain Climber x15IC

Windmill x10IC

CP x10IC

Arm Circles forward & backward, big and small.

Let’s mosey to the far end of the portico for some legs-o-shame….  What say you, Q?  You will be ashamed of your weak legs after we finish this quick medley, that’s what!  Too often around here, we do upper body exercises and neglect our legs.  Time to change that, at least for a day!

Mosey to the 4th column for jump squats; lunge walk 4 columns for Mike Tyson’s; quadraphelia 4 columns, stopping for some Donkey Kicks; mosey 4 columns and do some Bobby Hurley’s. Once we arrived at the end of portico, we came back the entire length by doing a burpee x side jump x burpee medley over each set of double cracks in the side walk.  There were at least 20 sets of cracks, so 40ish burpees were done by ALL Pax.  This was almost if you can’t do it, don’t Q it moment for YHC who is trying to get up to speed after a six-month hiatus.  I tried to stop this half way as it was so brutal, but @Forgotten Jelly (of all people) wouldn’t allow it.  Thus, we continued to the end of the portico with me bringing up the rear and nearly flat lining in the process.  @Avalanche and @Forgotten Jelly did my last two sets of burpees with me while the rest of the Pax LBC’d.  A quick airborne mindbender ensued so YHC could catch his breath.

We then moseyed to the far end of the portico and back for a quick break from exercises.  Following the mosey, we started another four-column mosey/exercise medley stopping for People’s Chair w/ air presses, CDD’s, Merks, Diamond Merks, Dirty Hook Ups, Partner Derkins, and what the hell, let’s do some more leg work and add 10 step ups each leg.

Mosey back to the starting line, stopping every few columns for some core work.  First we did Pretzel Crunch.  We then did some W’s and stopped in the middle for some Low Dolly and Low Flutter.  While calling for Low Flutter, YHC had to let it breath (unfortunately for the Pax).  The next exercise is the Low Flutter; ready position move; and instead of the word exercise, a straight Chernoble-like crop dusting just happened.  Straight outta YHC’s booty.  This derailed everything for everyone.  We tried to continue on, but just couldn’t….

Just kidding, we laughed for a sec and quickly got back on task.  We finished up our column mosey/core work with some reverse crunches.  Surprised I can even remember anything after the As$plosion….

We then did another full-length column mosey with Pax choice exercises including more Mike Tyson’s; lunge walks; and balls to the wall and/or donkey kicks.  Back to the front for some quick MARY and just like that it was over.  YHC was thankful to survive the beatdown and was also thankful that the Pax survived the As$plosion.

After name-o-rama and before prayer (intentionally), YHC dispensed some prison knowledge to the Pax and re-named @Ranger Tea Bag since he showed up with his pockets out.  If you wanna know what I’m talking about, watch the first season of Prison Break and check out the character Theodore Bagwell.  We then prayed for me and my demented mind; those who were not out here with us today; and all those who are struggling with mental illness.  May the Lord bring some healing and life back to those individuals.

Beatdown Moleskin:

That Burpee x Side Jump x Burpee medley wore me the hell out.  Hopefully it did you too!  Have a great day, Pax!

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