F-N-Gee, where is he?

PAX 

Voltron Tombstone Spud Catfish Java Psycho Marlboro Hip Firechicken Sandtrap Bozeman El Ab Hops Deertick Indy Finish Line Neverland Homeland Mayweather 

Everyone on earth EXCEPT the FNG showed up to welcome the FNG this morning. 

WARM UP 

The ONLY warm up. 

SSH x20ic

Hillbillies x10ic

Loose change x5ic

Arm circles forward and back 

Standard innuendo from Tombstone, grunts and groans from everyone else  

Lower Lot, 10-1 Ladder

V ups

Merkins

Rock Garden 

Curls, skull crushers, military press x10 

Run down to ASEC entrance and back 

Repeato 3 rounds 

Goblet Squats x10

KGB x10ic 

Run down to ASEC entrance and back 

Repeato 2 rounds 

MARY 

Down Dog to Cobra to Plank to finish with the usual Tombstone commentary 

PRAYERS

Skinner and his family with the loss of his mother 

Alex Barnhardt’s family after his passing 

Praise for Firechicken’s sister wrapping up her first trimester in the clear after a long journey 

MOLESKIN 

King Bozeman decreed that Spud shall take the Q this morning for his FNG so he could invoke Prima Nocta, but Spudheart bravely stood his ground and defied the King. Knowing that one of you assholes would step in and do a bunch of burpees and lunges, I decided to step up to protect our little FNG cherub. I would spend the entire drive over to ASEC this morning designing the perfect cupcake Q specifically for him. 

I arrived and saw Indy warming his hands by a trash can fire just after he hopped off the roof of the Polar Express because he didn’t have a ticket. I fought my way through the crowd of 274 pax searching for our guest to reassure him that I would take care of him, only to find he hadn’t showed. Disappointed, I pitter pattered .01 miles to the warmup area which would be about the hardest thing we would do. Also since I haven’t seen more than 6 people on a Thursday morning before, I planned half our workout around the 3 pull-up bars. But literally thousands of pax showed up this morning from across the Carolinas, so I had to call a quick audible.

I am glad I didn’t stay up all night designing the perfect FNG Q for today, and I think there’s a lesson to be learned in there somewhere. 

2 days in a row my morning got Shanghai’d at the last minute by my son so it was a pleasure to lead today. Looking forward to slowly transitioning y’all over to Hardee’s for coffee. Always a pleasure to have Voltron surprise us from SC. I learned today that he is also a Citadel graduate, which makes sense because he’s at least twice the man as the rest of you. 

Will get info about our Christmas family posted tomorrow including a list of kids and ages and sizes along with a wish list item each. Thanks for being the kind of guys to always do things like this. I’m proud to be friends with all of you, even Tombstone.